The Things I Learned in France

In retrospect, France may have truly been the best year of my life. At least in terms of how much I grew up. I used to talk about how I could never compare my years abroad in Japan and France, especially when people would ask which one I enjoyed more. And I still hold true to that even after all these years of 20/20 Hindsight. But the thing is Japan was a cakewalk compared to France. Surviving my year in France was hard. But I did it, and I truly believe I became an adult and a better person because of my year in France. I say this, of course, because my first night back in Burgundy, L R said, "You've become very European." Furthermore, hanging out with Chacha and her friends yesterday led me to believe that I truly have become more European. But there are several things that I learned in France that I only now realize I have learned.

1.] The only way out is through. My winter in France was somewhat dreadful. Of course, I say the same thing about my winter in Japan as well. I think I have Seasonal Affect problems, so I feel like any country with a gray cloud and a drop in temperature will make me somewhat miserable. But my French was so bad and I was not fitting in with the people in my school and class, and I spent many days waiting for that light at the end of the tunnel. It certainly did come along, and I feel like a stronger person because of that experience. In fact this year at Clemson, I had a very difficult and challenging year. In one semester, I alienated my sorority experience, lost my best friend and Freshman roommate, and had a major life crisis. I do not know if I could have gotten through the semester without my experience in France

2.] Who cares what other people think? Sure, I'm not entirely an expert on the subject. But France gave me the  opportunity to sort through people that I truly care about and respect their judgements, as well as people who do not deserve that respect. I spent a lot of time worrying about my French and others perceived me while in France, but it was because most of the time it was people I truly cared about. If I cared about what everyone though, the old Rotarians, the random stupid school kids, and so forth, than I would have hated my life beyond the ability to live it.

3.] Live a little bit. I wish I had learned this sooner. I am not entirely sure I learned this in France, but just afterwards when I used my experience to make college more fun. I wish I had drank more beer, smoked more cigarettes, and been more of a typical French teenager (well maybe not smoked.) Go with the flow, rather than try to fight it and miss out on what the common people do. I spent more time clinging to my roots, telling myself to drink less and do only what is 'right.' But sometimes what is 'right' is not always the most fun and even holds you back from missing the culture. I wish I had gone out with Cha Cha more and sat in the Brasseries with a beer or two, rather than sitting at home or avoiding going out with her all together. I realized this was my problem when I returned back to the United States, and I changed myself for the better.

4.] Eat. It is one of those stereotypes about France that is completely and hundred percent accurate. The French adore eating, but at a different level than Americans. We eat quickly and just for nourishment. Sometimes I think Americans eat because it is a painful experience that people are embarrassed of and that's why we do it and not think much of it. I know for certain that this is my reasoning. Coming to France, I will not admit to you that I had an eating disorder, but I will admit that I had some serious misinterpretations of eating. I avoided it, until L R put down her foot and forced me to act French and enjoy the food. Somewhere along the way I relearned how to eat. I have gained quite a few pounds since  my first day in France that first time, but I now have an appreciation and an appetite for food.

5.] There is no such thing as normal. I had convinced myself that I was completely unconventional and that I was no where near the definition of normality. But now I am not so sure. I think everyone thinks they are special in some sort of way, and everyone is special in some way shape or form. Mind you special might not always have a good connotation. I think being normal is a bad thing on some level, because it means your identity is just like everyone else's. The more I wrote on this blog how unconventional my life is, the more I began to realize that it's not unconventional at all. It's just a little different than the kids who stayed in High School and matriculated straight to college.

6.] The more things change, the more they stay the same. Okay, so I did not exactly learn this on the year of my exchange. This is more of a right here right now realization. but it is true. Things have changed very little since the last time I was here.  I have a lot to say on the subject, but I think I will just leave it at this for now.